Oh Alex, I don't know what it is about you that intrigues me, but it's probably that mind of yours that makes you think you can date/marry/fuck any cartoon character no matter what they are and expect THEM to get pregnant. The fact you switch cartoon characters in the blink of an eye also makes you something of a whore, but I'm trying to help you here. So let's see who you've tried to woo unsuccessfully...
First, as far as my knowledge of you goes, is Stewie Griffin. Not only is he a baby, he would probably kill you just thinking about gettin' it on with a teenager. Even if he did, you'd end up just like Olivia when he finds out you moved onto...
Kang, one of the aliens from The Simpsons. I've never seen hentai but I'm pretty sure that's what was on your mind when you picked him to be your fuck buddy. Either that or anal probing. It was around here when I got more vocal towards her about getting off the damn internet and find a real boyfriend. But instead you chose...
Rick from Rick and Morty. I've never watched the show, but judging from previews I see of upcoming episodes, he doesn't think highly of women. He's in his 50's or 60's. He could be old enough to be your grandfather. I thought she went off the edge here, but now she's starting to turn her eyes on...
Dogbert from the Dilbert comics. First we have pedophilia, then tentacle hentai, then whatever you call the opposite of pedophilia, and now bestiality! I don't even know why you decided to start getting attracted TO A FUCKING DOG!
You know, I'd LOVE to see fanart of all her past crushes coming together to hold an intervention. Kinda like that Valentine's Day episode of Family Guy where all of Brian's past exes return and start telling him off. I'd pay to see that in a museum. If someone does though, add a few dozen empty chairs, I have a feeling she'll be adding more and more fictional characters to those chairs...
Who did that remind me of (?)
ReplyDeleteI've seen people who had crushes on worse characters...Ranger Smith, Dick Dastardly, Long John Silver, Eric Cartman. Have you heard about JohnofE, he's this guy from New Zealand, who's "married" to Norbert the beaver (whom I'm pretty sure had a girlfriend on his show) and also "in love" with Brian and the dog from "Footrot Flats" (an NZ comic strip)
ReplyDeleteOne of my characters I have a soft spot for and I'm smart enough to know that she's my own character.
DeleteAnd there's a brony who lives in California, that wants legislation that would make it legal to officially marry a fictional character.
DeleteProof: http://mylittlewaifu.com/member.php?action=profile&uid=378
Note: If you want someone for the brony glue factory, this website is a goldmine.
The word you're looking for is "Gerontophile", other than that, good blog.
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ReplyDelete(Sorry, I wanted to retype this)
DeleteI have watched the entire first season of Rick and Morty, and I can confirm that Rick cares little for women. Or people in general. He looks down on pretty much everyone else, and in his first appearance, he plans to wipe out humanity and "start fresh".
(If you already know about Kif, then don't read the rest of this)
ReplyDeleteShe had another "crush" before Stewie. His name was Kif and (in case you didn't know) he's an alien from Futurama.
Sounds a lot like Reese Ambler of the Poohphile fandom. Dating & breaking up cartoon girls' hearts since 2012-2013.
ReplyDeleteHere's a parody I decided to improve from some parts of Katy Perry's Hot n Cold:
He changes cartoon girls like a guy changes cars. He's such a mental problem that no one can fix. Why I do know about it? Of course, he has an IQ lower than Forrest Gump!!! He's hot n he's cold, he's yes and he's no, he's in and he's out. He thinks he's right but he's always wrong, his judgment's black and black, he's never up & always down, he disses people and make them suffer. Why? Why will he never change soon, oh? Oh, we'll never know! He's hot n he's cold, he's yes and he's no. He never changes for the sake of the nostalgiatard in him!
So Alex is fangirling over the Warden from Superjail! now.
ReplyDeleteAlex is a preteen so can't have fuck anybody until she's 18 or can't marry anybody until she's 18 as well, I guess that user was like 12 years old when she made her account, Besides, I didn't made my DA until I was 13 years old. (I was born in July 2004.)
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