FuraShitty: Kingdomheartsforme

And we begin our first proper induction. I apologize for the lack of updates following the relaunch of the blog. I've mentioned before that I was currently in a local production of The Sting, which just closed on Sunday, so that was eating up most of my time.

But now that the show is over (expect a highlight reel of my performance once I get the DVD) I can get back to what I do best.

Since I already had a list on who do review next in the videos, I will keep them on hold until I get the mojo to make proper videos again. So with that in mind, who will be first?

Kingdomheartsforme

Kingdomheartsforme, AKA Thomas Rowlandson, is yet another uber-Disney fanboy. You can tell by this list of Disney films he lists.

Apparently commas don't exist in the UK.

And much in the way of Wisconsinites being required to be Packers fans, this Brit is a fan of Doctor Who, because that also seems to be a requirement. No offense to Whovians, I've only seen the few episodes they aired on Disney XD.

Alright, now that we've showcased his...interests, let's get to the art.

Dammit, I used the "this is the artist's kid's work" joke too early. Either this guy is 8-9 years old and faked his birthyear, or he has not improved art-wise since elementary school. My money is on the latter.

Have you noticed something about his art? For being on a site called FurAffinity, there isn't a lot of fur in his art. Last time I checked, FA isn't deviantART 2: Electric Boogaloo. FA is meant for art of a furry nature. Yes he does have SOME furry art, it's only a minority of his current gallery.

Okay, let's go through some specific features from his gallery. Starting with...

CROSSOVERS

Yeah, a shartist wouldn't be complete without some crossover art. Most of these don't even make any sense from a non-autistic mind. And no, he doesn't give any explanation for the pictures. Just a "Here's Harry Potter and Baby Peter Rabbit." or "Here is Anastasia and Dimitri petting Bambi." and nothing else but copyright spiel. Nothing more, nothing less. If I didn't know any better, this was his application to become a Poohphile. Hell, he might as well be part of a British sect of the Poohphiles. Next up is...

FAKE DISNEY REMAKE "POSTERS"

Yes, everyone and their mothers know about Disney's live-action remake kick they've been on. Some have been pretty good (The Jungle Book, Pete's Dragon, Cinderella if you go by those who only went to see the Frozen Fever short before it) and most have been pretty crappy (Alice in Wonderland, Maleficent, The Sorcerer's Apprentice, Race To Witch Mountain). And with adaptations of Beauty and the Beast and Winnie the Pooh around the corner, Tommy decided to throw his top hat into the ring with his own.

Just a reminder, these aren't the work of a Disney animator's son who wants to "help his dad" with pitching ideas to the company. No, this is a (presumably) grown man with shitty drawing skills trying to live out his fantasies by putting as many Doctor Who actors and actresses in fake Disney remakes. No shit, his Snow White poster has three Doctors in it alone. 

And, just a nitpick, but in every production of Peter Pan (NBC's live version not withstanding) the actor who portrays Captain Hook also portrays Mr. Darling. This is common theater knowledge on par with the fact that Peter is usually played by a girl. HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THIS?

And while this isn't a category itself, I do believe this needs to be addressed...

UNNECESSARY VIOLENT CONTENT

Now so far, we've established Tommy-boy's artwork is on par with a first grader, second grader if you're being nice, but then we get to the more disturbing parts of his gallery. For example, show that one picture with Snow White and the First Doctor again.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

YOU KNOW THERE ARE BETTER WAYS OF MAKING TRIBUTE PICTURES THAT DON'T INVOLVE SHOTGUNS TO THE FUCKING HEART!

Oh but this is TAME compared to the rest of his disturbing artwork. Let's look at some, shall we?

Apparently this woman is from EastEnders.

Someone seems to have a thing against Christopher Robin.

Oh you don't even want to see the description Tommy put on this one. It's very descriptive.

Seriously, what is your beef with the Winnie the Pooh franchise? I thought you were a Disney fan!

This style of art does NOT go with these graphic depictions of fictional characters. This kind of shit is either Exhibit A of a troubled child's behavior or child drawings seen in horror films. Just look at the opening credits of Children of the Corn and you'll see what I mean.

I could go on for a lot longer, but I'd just be repeating myself; this art style doesn't fit the content seen. He's also into diapers and vore, but I've already given my thoughts on both of those fetishes. I think I've said plenty about Tom-Tom here.

So this has been Kingdomheartsforme. Yeah I know there isn't really any proper Kingdom Hearts fanart, but take it from me, Jacobyel has taken that bloodsoaked cake already.